You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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