I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
