: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
