Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
