The maid of honor just puked.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
