put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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