i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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