Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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