Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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