if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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