Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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