That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize