Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
