Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
