yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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