So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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