Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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