There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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