Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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