Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
