Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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