I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
