Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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