I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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