Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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