Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
