how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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