He is such a slut. More and more my type.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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