hotel room ftw
You work out of a Hotel?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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