she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Rumble strips road head = magical
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
