fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
