Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
