and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Randomize