I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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