Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
