can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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