my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
