I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
