Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
