Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
...so i touched it.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
