doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
