Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize