Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
he shaved USA in his pubs
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
