is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize