Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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