Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
