I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
