I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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