we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
