she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
