Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
