ya dads aren't the best wingmen
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
